Two funny stories

Funny little story 1. There is a woman in town that makes white beans in a cauldron on the side of the road, just after the post office. Very nice, and whenever we want beans she’s our first stop. She is also trying to help us learn more Nagot, and the logical starting place was the word beans, or Abobo. Every time we would walk by, we’d greet her in French and then point to the cauldron and say Abobo. After a few weeks, the French got dropped and we started using Abobo in place of every phrase with varying inflection. Below is a sample transcript:

Us: BEANS! (How are you?)

Her: BEANS! (Very good, and you?)

Us: BEANS! ( Fine, how are the kids?)

Her: BEANS! (Good, thank you for asking.)

Us: BEANS! (And the work?)

Her: BEANS! (It goes. How is your house?)

Us: BEANS! (It is well.)

Her: BEANS! (Would you like any beans?)

Us: BEANS! (No, thank you though.)

Her: BEANS! (Ok, See you later.)

Us: BEANS! (Goodbye)

I’d like to think we could have gone on all day discussing everything from Kenyan violence to the shortcomings of Collateralized Debt Obligations just by yelling BEANS! at eachother. Who knows, maybe we already did.


Funny story 2. So when kids see us, they like to sing the unibo song, unibo being the nagot term for “white skin” (just don’t know where they get the idea, oh well). Translated, it goes a little something like this:

White Skin (Unibo)
Gift Me (Cadeau)
Kala Kala (Kala Kala)
Thank You (Merci)

Well, after the 74,328th time you’ve heard it, you start to have a little fun with the kids. In our case, that includes the occasional full charge sprint at the group of kids, a move that strikes beyond the fear of god into them and they run away mortally terrified the white man is going to come devour them.

Of course, the parents think this is hysterical, but these are the same people who will take a sleeping toddler and hold him right up next to your face, then wake him up so the first thing he sees is my strange white face 4 inches away. And it is usually pretty funny as the kid turns into the Tasmanian Devil, swinging limbs and screaming indecipherably out of terror.
But back to chasing children. On our way home from the market one day on a back road, there were a group of kids by a house about 20 feet away. Seeing the opportunity we run full speed at them and they predictably scatter, but in this case we outran them back to their house.

As we were waiting and laughing with the older kids, one of the youngest, a girl of maybe three (and sporting a just spectacular of a weave) came waddling up trying in vain to pull up her pants that had fallen down while running, and in the middle of her terrified cries gives us a proper Nagot greeting, something like this:

“WWWWAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH-E Ka Bo-WWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!” Without missing a beat.

Funniest thing we saw all day that day.